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If you had just woken up from a coma you would swear that West Ham had just won the treble & the Grand National, not moving house.
One day while driving along, he saw a priest. He thought he would do a good deed, so he pulled over and asked the priest, "Where are you going, Father?" He goes into the changing room to find all his teammates looking a bit glum. “What’s up?” He asks. “Well, we’re having trouble getting motivated for this game. We know it’s important but it’s only Spurs. They’re shit and we can’t be bothered.”
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A policeman was driving along one day when he saw a car in a ditch. When he looked inside he saw a deceased man with a Spurs shirt on, a d*ldo up his a*se, a pink tutu on and a lot of over-the-top make-up. The Pope is horrified, and makes it clear that he would rather die than betray his vows. But the Cardinals and Nuncios and all the prelates in the Vatican plead with him to reconsider. The Church desperately needs his able leadership, and surely God can forgive any sin. . .
Watching the West Ham fans faces watching this band playing out their last game at their stadium is the best thing I've seen all season After a few pints, they wonder how the game is going, so they get the landlord to put the TV on. A big cheer goes up as the screen shows “West Ham 1 (Maradona 10 minutes) – Tottenham 0 He is beating Spurs all by himself! Lucas Paquetá was born Lucas Tolentino Coelho de Lima on 27 August 1997 and grew up on Paquetá Island in Guanabara Bay, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. Paquetá Island is a tiny car-free island of just 0.46 square miles which was originally home to the indigenous Tupi people before being ‘discovered’ by France in 1555. The Portuguese expelled the French 12 years later. Modern-day Paquetá Island is a car-free idyll with a population of around 3,000.
Many big-name stars have played for The Hammers with some of the most notable including three of England's World Cup-winning team from 1966: captain Bobby Moore and goalscorers Geoff Hurst and Martin Peters. Other legendary players to have donned the famous claret shirt with the blue sleeves include Billy Bonds, Trevor Brooking, Frank Lampard Snr, Mark Noble and Vic Watson. Second,” he says, “she must be deaf — so that even if I should cry out in my passion, she will not be able to recognise my voice.” Climb in, Father. I'll give you a lift!" The priest climbed into the passenger seat, and they continued down the road. West Ham have raised the bar here. There'll be music + laser displays every time a club cordon off 6 seats to fix a leaky roof from now on.
Whether you’re cooking ham or see it at the store, read the funniest ham puns to get yourself and everyone around you laughing non-stop. Photo by David Em/Box of Puns. My mom wrote this joke: What's the difference between a sweet potato fresh out of the oven and a pig thrown off a balcony? One is a heated yam and the other is a yeeted ham A 0-3 defeat to Southampton leaves West Ham in the relegation zone as a dreadful start to the 2016/17 Premier League campaign accompanies their much-discussed move to the London Stadium this season.West Ham's do looks a bit pony when you compare it to what the Koreans did earlier https://t.co/jRgBVQkSBA They can often be found donning a flat cap, too, presumably handed to them by the club in a desperate attempt to make them look like an ordinary fan How can you not love West Ham though seriously? A club that gives Matt Etherington a parade will always be in my heart. Q: You're trapped in a room with a Lion, Cobra snake and an West Ham supporter. You have a gun with two bullets. What should you do?
These were the best of the West Ham ceremony jokes after their last game at Upton Park before a move to the Olympic Stadium was followed by a lengthy celebration of their time at the ground. Currently managed by David Moyes, over the years the club has been led by a number of highly-successful managers. Some of the most iconic West Ham managers of all time include Harry Redknapp, Billy Bonds and John Lyall, who was in charge for an incredible 708 games. In an era when management turnover was far less than it is today, the club had just four managers (Syd King, Charlie Paynter, Ted Fenton, Ron Greenwood) in charge for a period from 1901 until 1974. But in the midst of all that there were a whole lot of jokes and these are the best of them after West Ham continued their poor start to the season with a 0-3 loss to Southampton this weekend: Don’t be stupid Diego, you got a draw against Spurs all by yourself. And they only scored at the very very end,” said the teammates.
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First,” he says, “the woman must be blind, so that she cannot see who it is that she is having relations with.” We probably didn’t do quite as well from January onwards last year, that was my feeling. We had some brilliant nights, we got to the semi-final of European football. In the last game of the season we finished seventh, but we were 10 minutes from finishing sixth above Man United. Because he’s a Spurs supporter. He always reacts like that when we lose a match. He wants us to win the European Trophy,” the dog’s owner replies. Oh dear, the west ham send off has turned into holiday camp entertainment.. Are we having fun? "groovey"
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