MOTHERS TABOO

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Mama, what are you doing, why haven’t you called? Won’t you at least let us know if you’re alive or dead?” Kenny sat up and placed his feet on the cool floor, then walked slowly to the window. He knew he had the best view in Sheldon, a village of 200 people near Truro, Nova Scotia. His house sat on a hill overlooking the highway. He felt like an owl settled on a branch watching the world move along.

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In most films,” Emily Gould writes in Vanity Fair, “a child’s bath time symbolizes tender innocence and womblike safety.” But the most memorable recent scene of bath time portrayed on screen, from Mare of Easttown, involves a young mother recovering from an opiate addiction passing out from exhaustion while her young boy nearly drowns. (She later relapses and loses her hope of regaining custody over him.) The myth that motherhood “will give something without taking something irreparable and valuable away” is “so deeply woven into our culture,” laments Adrian Horton in the Guardian—but who exactly believes today that motherhood does not exact costs? Who ever has? Already in Genesis—no more than three chapters in—we see God cursing Eve: “In pain you shall bring forth children.” To Gyllenhaal, the story of The Lost Daughter exposes the entrenched myth of the “natural mother.” But we need merely to switch from Netflix to HBO to find, in the penultimate episode of the third season of the TV show Succession, Caroline, ex-wife of the grand patriarch Logan Roy and mother to the three contenders to his throne, telling her own daughter: “Truth is, I probably should never have had children. … Some people just aren’t made to be mothers.” Sévère, Richard (Winter 2018). "Pandarus and Troilus's Bromance: Male Bonding, Sodomy, and Incest in Chaucer's Troilus and Criseyde". Texas Studies in Literature & Language. University of Texas Press. 60 (4): 423–442. doi: 10.7560/TSLL60402. ISSN 0040-4691. With the help of my mommy friends, I created this little intimate photography project just in time for Mother’s day, to remind everyone what motherhood really looks like. Some might find these interesting pictures raw, but that's how it is in real life.He enjoyed staring out the window at night, elbows on the window-sill, chin cradled in his hands. There was a time when he dreamed of being an astronomer or 'star-gazer.' Everything seemed so peaceful up there. Right now the stars were bright, their luminous eyes keeping him company. He could see the Big Dipper or ‘Ursa Major’ as he learned in school. He learned to play chess with Larry and had come over many times to help pile wood and mow the grass. It soon become his second home. Because I realized that I wasn’t capable of creating anything of my own that could truly equal them.”

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For its courage to portray such an apparently unsympathetic mother tenderly, without condemnation or judgment, the film has received much critical acclaim, some deserved. “Leda is often rude and unkind,” Lydia Kiesling wrote for the New York Times Magazine, but the performances “allow the viewer to inhabit her desperation, rendering judgment irrelevant.” The combined result is a rare, truly realistic representation of motherhood through the ages: “a crafty treatise on maternal ambivalence” (the Washington Post), “an astute portrait of the painful expectations of womanhood” ( Paste). It’s been over a year now and everyone has wanted to watch every time, so far. The last text I sent read, “It’s now time for the Mommy and Tommy show out by the pool, for anyone interested in watching us do it soon… Please be ready to join us in less than 5 minutes.” My daughter and husband eagerly took their front row seats in tense anticipation. My son followed me out of the pool and over to the laid out towel just in front of our, “Watchers.” Most people dismiss ‘ The Reader‘ as a mediocre, Oscar-bait drama that’s nothing more than a skin show. But I, for one, love the film. It’s deeply flawed and may come off as a bit of a drag at times but just too beautiful and humane to dismiss. The film depicts the complex sexual relationship between a teenage kid and a woman in her mid-30s. Kate Winslet is stunning in her role as a woman struggling to deal with her inner demons and deeply torn by her shameful past. Watch it for its delicate rendering of humanity. Schaeffer, Neil (2000). The Marquis de Sade: A Life. Harvard University Press. p.122. ISBN 9780674003927.

To himself he said softly, "OK dad, I'm ready now. Let's go." And he felt good inside as his paddle dipped in the water... Boys Don’t Cry’ is a harrowing look at repressed sexuality and gender identity. The film is based on the real-life story of Brandon Teena, an American trans man who was brutally raped and killed in Nebraska. Brandon, played by Hillary Swank, adopts a male identity and moves to Nebraska, where he falls in love with Lana. They remain lovers despite Lana discovering Brandon’s true identity. Their romance is painful and uncertain as violence consumes their blissful but brief and fleeting span of time. If your idea of powerful cinema happens to be one that has the power to devastate and disturb you emotionally, then this is your kind of film. Kenny pretended to be asleep, one arm flung out. His fingers were open as if waiting for a handshake from someone.

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I haven’t been the biggest fan of ‘The Graduate’ except for its ending which, in my opinion, is one of the finest ever in cinema. It’s quite difficult to relate to a coming-of-drama that’s more than 50 years old. But there are some amazing moments in the film that still hold up well and manage to move me tremendously. ‘The Graduate’ was a trendsetting phenomenon that changed the way coming-of-dramas were made. The feeling of angst and sexual tension felt by Benjamin is palpable. He is seduced by the wife of his father’s business partner but ends up falling in love with her daughter. As I said, it might not hold up well for modern audiences, but it’s still an incredible experience and an absolute fun ride.

Motherhood Is Being A Maid

Marry James?" Kenny's look was nasty. He waited for an answer as he noticed his mother's nervousness. She always looked around the room when she was stumbling for words. He noticed Larry's peaked hat, with the perch fish on its front. Red vest, blue shirt, worn jeans and bare feet completed the picture. Larry's paddle was ready for action. And his eyes seemed at peace with himself. They were always full of laughter. Larry didn't pay money for chores. "Instead I'll be glad to take you hiking or even go on a fishing trip,” he had said. No doubt, frank portrayals of the tedium and pain involved in raising young children serve the important function of normalizing the bouts of impatience, frustration and anger that are par for the course for parents. Sympathetic representations of such unflattering moments help reassure young mothers that their own struggles to maintain composure and cheer are not idiosyncratic. But reviewers see much more in the film: it breaks a code of silence, they say, freeing us from the harmful cultural prohibition on speaking the truth about the challenges of motherhood and how hard it can really be for women to embrace it. This assessment is almost unanimous: The film “unravels the myth that motherhood comes naturally to women” and shatters “one of our culture’s most enduring and least touchable taboos: the selfish, uncaring, ‘unnatural’ mother—one who doesn’t shift easily to care-taking, who does not relish her role, who not only begrudges but resents her children” ( the Guardian); it is “breaking the taboo on regretful motherhood” ( the New Republic); it “understands the secret shame of motherhood,” challenging “Hollywood’s ideas about what women owe to their children—and to themselves” ( the Atlantic). The film unsettles “the comfortable fantasy of selfless motherhood and whose interests it most serves” ( Vanity Fair). Leading the assessments of the film’s significance is Gyllenhaal herself, who, in an interview with the New York Times, described maternal ambivalence as “a secret anxiety or terror” and said she was driven to make the film out of a desire to “create a situation where … these things were actually spoken out loud.” On this view, the film does not merely bring to light a particular form of suffering, it performs an ideological service of historic proportions.