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If for any reason anal sex remains painful or you notice the appearance of lumps, bleeding, or an ongoing itch, see a healthcare professional immediately for a thorough anorectal examination. Find Bottom Friendly Medical Support Rimming can provide some lubrication and helps the anus relax before sex. That said, rimming can put both partners at risk for STIs, so be careful. Dental dams may be used as a protective barrier to minimize the risk of infection, but can obviously be awkward to use. Politch, J. A., Mayer, K. H. & Anderson, D. J. HIV-1 is undetectable in preejaculatory secretions from HIV-1-infected men on suppressive HAART: AIDS 30, 1899–1903 (2016).

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According to sex and relationship expert Jessica O'Reilly, the key to anal play is relaxation. As she writes in The New Sex Bible: The New Guide to Sexual Love, there are two muscle rings known as the sphincter around the entrance to the anus. You want to be gentle with them when inserting anything into your butt. "Relax, breathe deeply, and bear down slightly with your sphincter muscles as you insert [a toy] for the first time," writes O'Reilly. Despite the fact that both men and women have been engaging in anal sex since the ancient Greeks (and probably long before that), there remains, in many circles, a stigma attached to it. But it’s paramount that people who are having anal sex feel comfortable discussing it with a knowledgeable and respectful healthcare provider. That’s why at Lighthouse, we work to connect patients with LGBTQ-affirming healthcare providers who have the training and experience necessary to provide holistic and nonjudgmental care. Because when it comes to bottoming — or any part of your sex life — no subject should be taboo.Dilators help with psychological fears by preparing you more for what to expect, giving you total control over your body, and erasing any fear or embarrassment in the eyes of a partner. Physically, they allow the sphincter to accommodate a penis over time and should help bottoming get easier

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Designed to enhance your anal pleasure, to plug, probe, massage and stretch your hole. All our plugs are high quality and designed for comfort, easy insertion, and ultimate gratification. Great for beginners through to extreme anal abusers! Butt Plugs for Men, Female Butt Plugs, Plugs for everyone! After foreplay, lubricate the outside of the anus and your partner’s penis. It’s important not to stimulate the bottom’s penis while attempting penetration. During penetration, if the bottom’s penis is stimulated, he is likely to experience the bulbocavernosus reflex, or the involuntary contraction of the anal sphincters. This reflex is more pronounced in uncircumcised men, and will make bottoming more painful and difficult. Richel, O., De Vries, H. J. C., Dijkgraaf, M. G. W., Van Noesel, C. J. M. & Prins, J. M. Risk Factors for the Presence of Anal Intraepithelial Neoplasia in HIV+ Men Who Have Sex with Men. PLoS ONE 8, e84030 (2013). If your anus is too tightly contracted when you are first penetrated, you’ll run the risk of tearing skin or damaging your sphincter. That’s why it’s important to relax your anus before penetration using various foreplay techniques and to keep your anus relaxed and well-lubricated while bottoming. After anal sex, shower normally with a gentle soap. Clean the outside of the anus very gently — do not attempt to scrub. Do not use enemas, including soap suds or Fleets. Get tested for STIs every three months if you are having anal intercourse with more than one partner, and every six months if you are monogamous. You can easily find a gay-friendly or gay-identifying doctor through Lighthouse to avoid negative discrimination or stigma. What If Bottoming Still Isn’t Blissful?Noor, S. W. & Rosser, B. R. S. Enema Use Among Men Who Have Sex with Men: A Behavioral Epidemiologic Study with Implications for HIV/STI Prevention. Archives of Sexual Behavior 43, 755–769 (2014).