3pk Original German Shammy Towels Super Absorbent Chamois Cloths Large Size 20x27 Inch For Home Kitchen Bathroom Car Pet Stains (Orange) by The Original German Shammy

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Remember, the ePromo Miracle Shammy is most absorbent when damp – yet polishes and buffs best when dry. Want to see the most absorbent material on the planet? Doesn’t look like much, this peach rectangle. Come and hold it if you want to. Don’t be shy, no one ever went no place being shy. Just to be clear, this gentleman here didn’t hear me a second ago. The single most absorbent material on the planet. I’ll give you one fact about it, before I tell you some more. It’s machine washable. Imagine that. The most absorbent material on earth, NASA use it, industry professionals won’t touch anything else, you see the Olympic Games? The German swimmers, what are they using for towels? This stuff. And when you’re done just throw it in the machine, let it dry on the line. Once you’ve got a hand up, bang, you’re good to start selling. You’ve got the confirmation. They want a Shammy. They’ve just admitted it. They want one for free, well and good. For them the “free” is the important thing. But the real thing we’ve identified here, the important thing that this spokesperson for the crowd – and they are the spokesperson, because everyone else is still there, show’s over, the people who aren’t interested have jogged on – the important thing is that the crowd leader, the chief of the clan, has just very publicly announced that the Shammy is wanted. And everyone else wants to see what happens next.

Miracle Shammy | Will Not Scratch Surfaces Miracle Shammy | Will Not Scratch Surfaces

My cousin makes them, he owns the factory, makes them out in Germany, best industrial standards in the world; sells them on TV on the Shopping Channel. I like to beat him. Keep listening. I live in Tallaght, that’s right, near the Red Cow roundabout. Centre of my world, the Red Cow. Slingshot off that baby and I go all over this country, go all over Wales too – England, Scotland even. Near the kids, they live in Tallaght.

I opened the door ready for a battle royale. He’s asleep on the floor. I wake him up: hey buddy, hey goof. And then all the piss goes out of me: he’s scared. Kid was tired; then he was scared. A slug of snot coming out each nostril. Looks like he hasn’t cried in ten years but he’s spent all that time doing nothing else but holding the tears in. Like he’s absorbed them. Ten times his weight in liquid.

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Your pet ever make a mess? Puppy not house trained? Got a golden reliever about the place? You want to get the mop out, put down newspaper? Spread it all over the floor? No, you want our friend the Miracle Shammy. He does all the work for you. Out I pour the cola — well it’s not cola, it’s water with a bit of food colouring in it. You have to change the bottle occasionally. The label scuffs, gets faded. Like those guys who sell waffles with Nutella on them, only the Nutella jar’s a hundred years old. You won’t catch me at that game. I buy the economy brand cola— nobody wants to see Coca Cola wasted, that’s sacrilege, right? He didn’t want to go again straight away. He knew the old lady was batshit crazy, didn’t want to jinx it. But the next time we were out he improved. The penny had finally dropped right. He ate a big thing of cotton candy and bought himself a burger and fries. Didn’t have to share the sandwiches from out of my grub box that day. Baking Cage – Use the baking cage to cook french fries, wedges, roasted root veges, prawns or any other foods that require constant turning to achieve even cooking.The free is the fantasy, the want is the reality. The Shammy is desired, and if there’s one thing we like to do, that’s service our desires. We’ve all agreed we want a Shammy, next step is even simpler than logic. We’re gonna get a Shammy. You go into the services on the M7 down near Moneygall. It’s a plaza, if you please. You want a coffee, you hit “Large” hold out the regular-sized cup, it’ll fill it up properly. You pay for the regular but you get a large. Think about it though: it’s still only the regular. You’re getting what you pay for. Not an easy thing to do. Think we all agree on that. My cousin, last time I heard, was a line chef at Casey’s Bar and Grill, downtown Suds. I’d be flabbergasted if he had a plant in Hungary churning out metre squares of synthetic hydrophilic polyfibre cellulose, and a neat little show on TV. Stranger things have happened though. How about those sweaters that can’t go in the tumble dryer? You know the ones taking up space in the hot press for days, turning it into a steam room, coming out covered in mushrooms? Or hogging the banisters on the landing for a week, always damp under the armpits? Take that jumper, roll it up in the Shammy. Fifteen minutes later it’s ready to wear.