The Best Ever Book of Portuguese Jokes: Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who

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Portuguese jokes are a great way to have some fun and learn about the Portuguese culture. Here are some of our favorites: I told you it was a tad crude! That said, you’d only be judged for using this phrase in a business or otherwise formal environment. 19. Com o pé nas costas The main difference between Austrians and the Germans is that Germans would like to understand Austrians but can’t, and Austrians understand Germans but would rather not.

With the empire they created, the Portuguese also created an evil that would linger in this world and to which the consequences we still see today: the Transatlantic Slave Trade. Short portuguese puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The portuguese humour may include short translated jokes also. De Qui Se Moque-t-On (Who do we make fun of?) features 345 jokes, many contributed by readers of Seignovert’s blog, Europeisnotdead. A 29-year-old Frenchman who studied in Spain and Germany and now lives in Brussels, Seignovert said the jokes underlined the adage that “teasing is a sign of affection. Some of them are pretty crude and unsubtle, but they’re rarely downright nasty”.

Alternatively, you can ask if they had dormido com o Bozo (i.e., “slept with Bozo”) as well, though Zoomers probably won’t get this one. The media attention has sometimes been too much, because we have to so much to do at school and work," says Mota. "We try to do what we can because we really want to win. It is our future." If you are told to go comb monkeys or to go bother Camões, you are being politely asked to go and bother someone else and leave the person speaking to you alone! In case you don’t know, Camões was a very well-known Portuguese poetry writer from the 16 thcentury that wrote the Portuguese famous book called “Os Lusíadas”, which tells the story of Portugal.

This is a great expression because it sheds a light on the sense of sarcasm of Portuguese speakers. It was originally used to describe a set of unenforced laws that officially banned the slave trade across the Portuguese Empire in the early 19th century. Only Macau remained part of the country (with Goa, Daman and Diu already being taken over by India before the Revolution) due to an agreement with China to slowly transfer the city to their rule, which happened in 1999.The rapid decolonization lead to a huge refugee crisis of nearly all of the Portuguese settlers, and many other people from the former colonies, to Portugal. These were known as the “retornados” (the returnees) and they numbered over 500,000 people. Der Deutschlehrer fragt Bini: “Was ist das für ein Fall, wenn du sagst: Das Lernen macht mir Freude?” Bini überlegt nicht lange: “Ein seltener, Herr Lehrer.” 4. Husbands hate shopping in every language, apparently

These days folks normally favor less polite phrases to express the same idea, but you’re guaranteed to make a native speaker laugh if you use it. Three reasons Jesus is an Italian: only an Italian son would live with his mama till he was 30. Only an Italian son could think his mama was still a virgin. Only an Italian mama could think her son was God. Here are a few thoughts about the jokes in this popular joke book, and a few things I have learned from reading it. I won’t trot out every new word, of course, but I noticed a few patterns and formats that came up again and again, and I thought it was worth noting them down. Being able to tell a good joke in another language is real jedi-level language skill, so I think it’s useful to know what the “rules” are. Piadas Secas and “Dry Humour”Manon Museux, 22, works as an intern with the quality control of the fish coming into the port in Peniche, Portugal.

Why did the Portuguese artist bring his pet fish to the gallery? He wanted to create a “masterpiece.” Even though they abolished slavery in all of the empire in 1869, they maintained the practice of “indigenous contract laborers”, who were in all except name slaves, until the end of the dictatorship. What I’m referencing here is the only kind of water the lower parts of your body typically release: pee. Another thing you should avoid in this sibling quarrel is to call Saramago Spanish. He went into exile for being censored in Portugal, a fact that still shames most of us, but he remains Portuguese. Instead of mentioning Mourinho, try endearing yourself by saying “José? José Saramago?” You’ll make a Portuguese friend. Assume Portuguese from Portugal is the same as Portuguese from Brazil. An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are planning a party. “I’ll bring six pints of bitter,” says the Englishman. “I’ll bring six pints of Guinness,” says the Irishman. “I’ll bring six friends,” says the Scot.

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The Empire started to decline, however, when the Dutch, English, and French got in the colonial and trading game. They started to surround or conquer the scattered Portuguese trading posts and territories, diminishing their power. It is usually said that the Portuguese were great at finding things, but awful at keeping them. This one is slightly off-color, only in a sort of dadlike way. Tirar (uma) água do joelho literally means “to get (some) water off one’s knees”, which under normal circumstances shouldn’t be possible. But when lawyers at GLAN suggested suing governments via the European Court of Human Rights, he hesitated. He wasn't sure what a lawsuit was, only that it was "something adults did to each other." The Portuguese Colonial Empire was the starter of this all and this is a legacy that no country would want for themselves… Trade An old Portuguese lady kept repeating, “I’m so thirsty! I’m so thirsty! Oh, how thirsty I am.” A passerby saw her and gave her a bottle of water, which she gulped down. Instead of thanking him, she simply changed her refrain: “I was so thirsty! I was so thirsty! Oh, how thirsty I was.”