DIRTY LAUNDRY: Why adults with ADHD are so ashamed and what we can do to help

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This book was AMAZING. It was the first book I have finished in years, I read it cover to cover on a plane ride unable to put it down. To further simplify things, buy fuss-free, permanent press, wash-and-wear garments; they are your friends! Weed out the rest, and keep weeding until there is enough room to put things away easily in drawers and closet. If you have mostly permanent press clothes and you take them out of the dryer when the egg timer buzzes, you can eliminate ironing. Drop off formal wear at the dry-cleaners to be pressed. From the viral TikTok duo, @ADHD_Love comes a tried-and-tested, no-guilt and no-shame guide to self-love and navigating relationships with ADHD This book breaks down all the shame and stigma that gets in the way of meaningfull relationships and provides all parties with a roadmap forward. What if you stopped feeling ashamed of constantly being late or of getting so hyperfocused on a task that you drop everything else you had to do? How can you as a partner, parent, or friend better understand your neurodivergent loved one’s way of moving through the world?

The crux of their ADHD_love_ videos highlights the day-to-day of a couple where one of them is an adult with ADHD (diagnosed late, as an adult) and feeling their way through it. Also they depict how a relationship works when one of you is neurotypical and the other one isn't. These are funny, true, and sometimes unexpectedly touching, and the book brings all of this to the table. If anything, it's even more nurturing. It's clear they've both done a lot of work in therapy (separately and probably together) and they pay it forward to people (like myself) who are fresh on their journey and still processing. DIRTY LAUNDRY is an unfiltered look into the chaos of real life with ADHD. It will transform your self-hatred into self-acceptance, with simple tips that actually work for your brain. It will also help to educate partners, parents and friends, to help them move from frustration to patience, understanding - and love. The only sort of “negative” I would say is that the chapter on finances can be disheartening for those of us who do not have a partner that works in the banking industry or is good with finances. The chapter does give some good emotional support points, but it was the one chapter in which I could not connect with the idea of successfully conquering that area of my life.I am a 32 year old AuDHDer (I'm autistic and have ADHD - as well as other common mental health comorbidities). I've always felt like the female experience of these conditions often goes ignored, whether by professionals or everyday folks who have been trained by society to only see ADHD as something seen in hyperactive little boys, that it 'cant really be a disability', or that it's something someone can grow out of or simply learn to get a grip on.

Thank you for reading ADDitude. To support our mission of providing ADHD education and support, please consider subscribing. Your readership and support help make our content and outreach possible. Thank you. Save Filled with heartbreak and humour in equal measure, DIRTY LAUNDRY is an invaluable resource both for neurodivergents and the people who love them.Thank you both so much for this book. My therapist loved it after I suggested she read it and I love it to. Thank you both so much for your content and helping people with ADHD 🥰 Reading this book helped me learn things about myself. I was able to view myself from a new lens providing me with a new perspective ob myself. The authors do an AMAZING job at breaking down the content in an understandable way that makes you stay engaged and helps you. Filled with heartbreak and humour in equal measure, DIRTY LAUNDRY is an invaluable resource both for neurodivergents and the people who love them. The ultimate gift for anyone who wants to understand ADHD better.

Rox’s humour and honesty amidst the tumult of coming to terms with the 10 key symptoms of her adult ADHD diagnosis, and Rich’s commitment to learning, gently challenging and empathising, will no doubt provoke ’a-ha!’ moments in many couples, families and friendships—as they did for me. I couldn’t think of a better duo to tell this unfiltered story of acceptance, self-love and mutual compassion.”Publishing director Marianne Tatepo acquired world all-language rights in all formats from Oscar Janson-Smith at Gleam Futures in a “significant” two-book deal made in a 48-hour pre-empt.

The pair’s social media channels, @ADHD_Love, have more than 900,000 followers and their videos have been viewed more than 200 million times. They said: “It’s a rather scary thing, to share with the world that you struggle to shower and keep on top of laundry. To see those very vulnerable stories resonate with so many people has been incredibly heart-warming. ADHD can be very isolating so there is great comfort to be taken from realising that we are not alone. Listening to this book, and hearing the love and patience and wisdom you share has been lifesaving!! I cannot stress that enough. I feel seen for the first time in our marriage and my husband has seen what empathetic care with boundaries looks and sounds like. They share the strategies they have used to reduce shame, improve communication, and find happiness in their neurodivergent household. How can an individual with ADHD deal better with this undesirable chore? Here are a few helpful hints I share with my clients who complain of clothes piling up, staying in the washer or dryer for too long, and never finding their way to designated drawers and hangers. Doing Laundry with ADHD: 5 Sanity-Saving Tips 1. Simplify Your Wardrobe

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DIRTY LAUNDRY is an unfiltered look into the chaos of real life with ADHD. It will transform your self-hatred into self-acceptance, with simple tips that actually work for your brain. It will also help to educate partners, parents and friends, to help them move from frustration to patience, understanding—and love. Dirty Laundry is an unfiltered look into the chaos of real life with ADHD. It will transform your self-hatred into self-acceptance, with simple tips that actually work for your brain. It will also help to educate partners, parents and friends, to help them move from frustration to patience, understanding - and love.