Find Your People: Building Deep Community in a Lonely World

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It is a good idea to seek professional help from one of the therapists at BetterHelp.com as professional therapy can be highly effective in helping you to discover your true self. One final way that your past can shine a spotlight on the person you are (or wish to be) is by analyzing your regrets.

Find Your People: Building Deep Community in a Lonely World Find Your People: Building Deep Community in a Lonely World

It doesn’t matter if you do it for work or do it for play, but do what you like to do. Sports, hobbies, hiking alone, travel, reading, collecting cigars, whatever it is, do it. You don’t even have to be super passionate about it, but if you enjoy it, do it. You could choose to list out things such as your likes/dislikes, values, goals, things that are important to you, etc. This book is harder than you can imagine to put down. Though I’ve said this about other books too, there is a special pull to this message and grace to Jennie’s words. She’s lived the without and fought for the relationships that now form her closest friends and her village. And she will tell you where she failed and what she learned, and all of it will help you grow. You get that from the book—that she wants more than anything to help you grow so you can live in the fullness of together with your people.I love the idea of having a small group of friends that you get together with and be really involved with. I love the idea of weekly get togethers. I loved the biblical preaching of man is not made to be alone and how it goes into details about that. I love the sense of community. I love sharing the really ugly and the good and getting real about life. So yes, there is a lot of good to this book. Have you gone through a shift in your mindset or worldview – perhaps due to a single event or because you’ve reached a new stage of your life? The word “individual” has an inherent duality: it means the smallest member of a group. An individual is therefore never isolated; she is always connected. Every one of the 7.5 billion humans on the earth has value to offer, especially now in a distributed world where you can get things done through networks. This is the power of what I call “onlyness”: you’re standing in a spot that only you stand in, which is a function of your history, experiences, visions and hopes, and it’s from here you offer a distinct point of view, insights and ideas. When you can grow and realize those ideas through your networks and through connectedness, you have a new lever to move the world. Onlyness is like an individual, then, in that it is born of you and also that it unites you meaningfully with others; it is the connected you. And many of the strategies above are things you can continue to do on a regular basis to refine what it means to be you.

Find Your People (Jennie Allen) - Study Gateway Find Your People (Jennie Allen) - Study Gateway

I’ve started a quest to read a bunch of books on friendship and this was the second one. I’m wanting to learn how to be a better friend and reading books on the subject seemed like a good way to do it. Can’t find a deep, biblical community to be vulnerable with? Start one! Here’s how. (Get a firepit) In September 2006, this crew of coders, writers, makers and designers began meeting every Friday to work on their individual projects in each other’s company. They soon discovered they were more productive as a group. “We could just look up and ask for help on a technical glitch, or ask if anyone else know how to do X, Y, or Z. Our collective skills were strong,” says David. The more time they spent together, the more they learned from one another, were inspired by one another, and pushed one another. I have a hard time figuring out how to rate books such as these. Can I call it Christian fluff? There is nothing new or groundbreaking or deeply revealing in a book such as this. It’s a feel-good read, and in that case, it’s kind of boring. Any Christian in community for any amount of time would come to these conclusions about friendship if they sat down to critically think about it. In that way, this book is just stating the obvious, filled with platitudes about Christian community and friendship while loosely tying it to Scripture.What are the underlying reasons that you wish for these things? How does this translate into your current beliefs, values, and behaviors? This is a handbook of sorts for creating friendship and community in the modern world—specifically geared toward followers of Jesus—but with many universal truths. Truths about the kinds of people we need, the people who need us, why this is crucial, and how ruthless we need to be to incorporate all kinds of people into everyday tasks, daily meals, boring errands, and intentional conversations. We have to log hours upon hours to build those relationships. So it can be worth asking those who are close to you and who you trust what they think of when they think of you. You can either write in a daily journal if this appeals to you, or you could create a dedicated self-discovery document to house all of your thoughts and feelings related to finding yourself.

Find Your People — Jennie Allen

Perhaps you feel a little lost because you have yet to identify something that really fills you with joy and passion. If this is the case, the answer is to try out new things and expose yourself to different types of experiences. Identifying how you react emotionally to these experiences can teach you more about what you do and do not like as a person. Or do you feel like you have lost touch with who you are? Did you once have a good understanding of what really mattered to you? It’s not that there was anything wrong with my family or my school or the few friends I had, or my neighborhood—not at all. We all had our ups and downs, but we moved on and through it and had good times and bad. But I just felt a deep sense that the people around me were aliens. Or I was.If you can figure out what you like doing and what you don’t like doing, it can give you a better idea of your strengths and weaknesses. After all, you are not merely what you think and feel on the inside; you are what you say and do on the outside. Remember, to find yourself is to be able to move through life with confidence in who you are and what you stand for. By the time I got home and realized this was a very Christian themed book, I decided to give it a chance anyway. I liked the premise of building community after all. There were some good general things about cultivating friendship such as accountability, putting in the time m, conflict resolution etc. The layout of the book made it easy to read. Maybe you seek to avoid taking responsibility for things and prefer to be a follower rather than a leader.

Find Your People: Building Deep Community in a Lonely World

God built us to be in⁠ close-knit community, where we support and fight relentlessly for one another. Many of us dream of having a group of friends we can share everything with – the good and the bad. Sadly, the enemy is doing everything in his power to ensure that we remain divided and isolated. We must do our utmost to fight against him by building villages that serve as centers for spreading God’s love. To do that, we need to find and keep our people by following five simple rules: being in close proximity to one another, going deep, staying accountable, finding a shared mission, and resolving conflict. One of the biggest strengths of this book was its focus on application. Most chapters had explicit helpful guides on ways to build community. I found myself writing them down and thinking about them more. The book wasn't just platitudes, stories, or even examples of how she did it. Instead there were real good suggestions on ways to make this happen. I particularly appreciated a recurring theme of looking for the people already in front of you. If it’s a real person rather than a work of fiction, it might be worth seeing if there are any documentaries or interviews that you could watch, or whether they have ever written an autobiography you could read.Unfortunately, this description applies to a lot of people. According to research done by the health insurance company Cigna, more than three in five Americans report being chronically lonely. Taking these tests will open up a huge window into the type of person you are. 2. Observe Your Feelings My dear friend Jennie Allen shows ushow to make true emotional connections with the right peopleso that our authentic relationships can be healthy for all.”—Lysa TerKeurst, author of It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way